The Secret Life of Melanie O.
Monday, March 26, 2007
The Lawnmower Man
Dan has a continual battle with the lawnmower. The mower is second hand and at least 20 years old. It's been repaired several times, but never completely dies. Dan's never seen a reason to buy a new one, and now that we have a large mortgage, he's stuck with it for the time being.

It's been raining quite a bit where we live, and the grass grows like mad, so, every weekend, Dan has a new battle with the lawnmower. One week, he allowed it to run out of fuel, and even after refuelling, it refused to start until it had a nice long rest. In the meantime, we had a very patterned lawn, with high and low spots. Had he thought about it beforehand, Dan could have created a nice contour map or bas relief sculpture in the grass before the fuel ran out. We precipitously scoured eBay looking for rebuilt lawnmowers, thinking that "this is it." The end of the lawnmower.

Never one to give up, Dan decided to pay closer attention to the fuel level. This past weekend, he got the old mower out since the grass resembled something out of a Tarzan movie. It wouldn't start.


He swore at it.

It wouldn't start.

He gave it a good kick.

A couple more yanks on the starter and it reluctantly started up... and proceeded to belch blue oil smoke everywhere. I lost sight of Dan on the back 10 metres while blue smoke fumigated the trees. Dan however, was a man victorious. I saw him beat his chest and do a Tarzan yell as he pushed the mower through the lush grass.

The lawnmower must be on its last legs this time, but it's been on its last legs for the past eight years. Who knows how long this will go on? To be honest, I think that Dan secretly enjoys this battle with the lawnmower, as he always wins in the end. The weekly battle with the lawnmower and the lawn stirs something primitive within my husband. Mowing the lawn is not a chore to Dan - it's a conquest.
posted by Melanie O. at 8:44 AM -
  • At 1:40 AM, Anonymous irishnomad said…

    I cut the cable of my lawnmower last year...grass is getting longer and longer...will have to overcome my technophobia sometime...

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About Me
Name: Melanie O.
Home: Durham, North Carolina, United States
About Me: Female, American health and beauty-conscious professional who has rekindled a childhood love of dolls.
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